Thanksgiving Weekends

Introduction:
This is a jumbled up remembrance of Thanksgivings past around the orphans Thanksgiving Day celebrations .... short versions

One year at the U-District house, we had an amazing spread of food as always along with the amazing spread of booze. We crammed way too many people into a couple of small cars & drove to the goth club on capitol hill. There the Spits played a show that was absolutely insane. They threw pot's & pan's & dishes & microwaves out into the pit & all of us smashed the hell out of everything. Maggie & Kate got a hold of a couple of pot's & wore them to keep from getting their heads knocked in by all the flying mayhem. Nick was pole dancing naked on stage & without using his hands swinging his dick around in circles like a stripper girl would do with her tassels. The Spits were rocking it.

Another year at the U-District house, known as the bloodiest Thanksgiving ever. I was living here now & the day started out with another amazing spread of food & booze. The day got wild early in the evening when drunken playful fighting sporadically broke out around the house. A shot glass fight broke out, where we were throwing shot glasses at each other full speed. I almost got Johnathan square in the head once when I was aiming at Greg & Johnathan came around the corner just in time to have a shot glass coming straight at his skull, he was quick enough to duck back out of the way & I got my intended target right in the back. One of the shot glasses hit a gallon glass jar of pickles so hard it punched a hole right through the jar in a perfect circle without breaking the jar. All the juice above the hole ran out & in the morning we found the shot glass nestled in the bottom with the remaining pickles. At some point in the night someone got bloodied in some way & left bloody hand prints all the way up the banister into the upstairs bathroom & left a mess of blood on the sink. We never did figure out who that was & what happened. I was wearing some Tasmanian Devil slippers & gashed my foot wide open on some broken glass. The slippers soaked most of the blood like a sponge & squished it out as I walked around. At Maggie's insistence I went to care for the wound & poured peroxide & rubbing alcohol over it then wrapped it tight with Duct tape & put the bloody slippers back on & returned to the party just in time to enter a fight with Greg. I pounded him down then picked him up & bowled him like a bowling ball into the staircase which knocked him out cold. While Greg laid there unconscious Johnathan was starting a fight with Stephan, Stephan wanted nothing to do with it & turned, to which Johnathan put an egg in Stephan's shirt then proceeded to smack him on the back & smashing egg all over inside Stephan's shirt. Stephan elbowed Johnathan right in the eye knocking him down. Johnathan couldn't see from his eye for awhile & then regained his sight later with no ill effects except for a black eye. Johnathan went to the fridge to get some ice & found Greg there with his head fully in the freezer & asked him what her was doing. Greg said his head hurt.

This year Thanksgiving was more mellow but the night after we had Samfest a benefit concert to raise funds for a memorial for Sam. Early in these evening of bands Rochelle got bombed & started doing striptease & sex show like craziness in the booths. She was completely gone. Tanya, Tony, & I took her home & put her to bed. When I returned I was immediately approached for help with Johnathan. Apparently he had smashed up the green room with power dives into everything, smashing himself up as much as the room. Then he proceeded to go outside & was attempting to piss on a bum who was sleeping outside the bar when 3 officers approached him. The told him he was old enough to know better than that & her responded by repeatedly yelling at them that he was 40 years old. I'm 40Years old, I'm 40 yours old, etc. The bar bouncers told the officers they would get him out of there & home. Everyone was standing outside the bar when I arrived. The bouncers, many of Johnathan's friends, The 3 officers, The owner of the bar, The volunteer driver of a car to take him home. Johnathan was wrapped around the outside of the car door like a cat trying to not be thrown into a tub of water. I immediately walked through everyone, grabbed Johnathan by the face, punched him in the gut & when he collapsed pushed him into the car & closed the door. He immediately tried to grab the steering & drive controls of the car in the front seat, so I jumped in there & shoved him back to the back. I hopped into the back seat, wrapped up his arms & leg's with mine & shoved him sown to the space between the seats & told the driver Michell to get in & take us to Johnathan's. He screamed the whole way home like he was being killed & when we got him there he dropped to the ground on purpose & would not walk. Stevil & I carried him kicking ^& dragging all the way to his apartment.

The day after we were eating in the dock & a crazy broke out of his cage apparently. The crazy in the dock started yelling about how Wi fi is setting us up for nuclear Armageddon, theres one at a bar stool in every bar in America, they are using it to target us. Then started yelling give me matches! When he got them he yelled "Sulfer!" "GO!" lights the match tosses it on the ground & yells "Boom!" Then proceeded to rant more & left. This kept us very entertained for our breakfast after Samfest, Thanksgiving weekend.